To be the exact person we are at this moment in time, with this DNA, this personality and our unique perspective is a 1 in 400 trillion “chance” of being alive. Dr Ali Binazir illustrates it this way:
“It is the probability of 2 million people getting together to play a game of dice with trillion-sided dice. They each roll the dice and they all come up with the exact same number — for example, 550,343,279,001.”
You can think of yourself as a miracle of fate or physiology. So, what’s our purpose?
There is a lot of talk about finding our passion in the media. A google search turned up 189,000,000 results on the subject. That’s considerable pressure. That pressure increases when we see someone who seems to have taken their passion by the reigns and is riding it through the sky like a Pegasus.
Seeing someone doing something we love or is smack dab in their “true” passion, seem to exacerbate things that may not be going so well in our own life. Realize that is not really the case. It looks seamless but we don’t see all the failures, embarrassing moments or hurdles they’ve already crossed. They just keep trying.
Lazy is different than avoiding “pain”. Those most successful have pushed through the hard-painful stuff. At the risk of making this too simplified, here’s the skinny on manifesting your elusive passion.
Define Your Self Passion
Passion can mean many things, and it’s going to come from the very core of your personal story, not anyone else’s.
Remember that 1 in 400 trillion statistic? Your life is going to have its own path, and you will react to it with your DNA, from your personality, influenced by your circumstances and environment. Your passion can be anything that synchronously motivates, intrigues or challenges you. Your purpose can be connected to a vocation, family, or distinct meaning.
To think that we all have one singular purpose or passion is naive. That’s what makes it so hard. We feel bad if we don’t have it all figured out.
I have several passions, and I make them a part of my life. The one thing I do is focus on not fragmenting myself in too many directions. I love flying helicopters, but that’s not my job, it’s a passion. I love figuring things out and being technical, and I’ve’ utilized that in my job many times, but it’s not the direction I follow.
I feel most dynamic and connected to my intuition and intelligence when I write, travel and help others transform their goals.
Need a formula? Try this:
- Think with your heart, not your head.
- Ask those close to you what your strengths and weaknesses are.
- Make a list of your own self perceptions.
- Stack your love’s and dislikes against each other.
- Stop playing by the rules.
- Take action(s) daily.
- Test things out and learn.
- Use Mel Robbins 5,4,3,2,1 rule.
Achieving your passion means finding a balance and living up to one’s potential in all areas of life.
You Don’t Need Permission
I used to put so much pressure on myself that I would become overwhelmed and follow opportunities I didn’t really want because it’s what was expected; or I didn’t want to disappoint someone. Even harder to admit that it was the easier path to go. Because following your real purpose and passion is a lot of work.
In the end, there were times I ended up disappointing myself. And we are the ones who must live with ourselves 24 hours a day. Think about that.
I was focused on immediate control, rather than a bigger passion. We’re enamored with the idea that finding our passion is the key to life — getting away, being successful, free, doing something fun and adventurous, seeing cool things, meeting different people or being famous. It’s not. It all sounds so exciting but getting clear on what we want only happens with steps.
Our environment matters, our connections matter, our time matters, and our discipline matters. The more we understand this, the clearer we get on our passions.
Taking action means setting goals and forming a system. There can be no up without down, input without output, positive with negative and so on. You will oscillate, and that’s okay. Here’s the thing:
You don’t need anyone’s permission to follow your purpose. Likewise, you don’t need permission to be okay with not having one.
You won’t upset the order of the universe. Forming habits and following goals is still a purpose. If you’re looking to define your passion, utilize the steps above to get clear. It’s one of the most affirming things you can do for yourself.
Take Baby Steps
You must take action. Baby steps are fine, but you must move forward and keep trying. It’s inevitably the way we learn. It’s how we learned to walk, talk, read and tie our shoes. Did we judge ourselves as a child, as harshly as we do now? No.
When people talk about reaching their passion to feel whole, they really want to achieve balance. They want to reserve time for work, family, friends, and personal needs, but not overdo it. Here are a few things to take hold of without regret:
- Eliminate negative people from your life.
- Keeping appointments with yourself just like any other (yoga, reading, exercise, cooking….)
- Educate yourself and seek knowledge.
- Eliminate overextending yourself.
- Eliminate frivolous commitments, spending or tasks.
- Do more of what gives you a buzz of excitement.
- Achieve one thing a day towards your goals (passion or purpose)
Passion and curiosity come hand in hand, if you’re not wondering about new things and ideas you’re not tapping into your potential passions.
Even the expert was once a beginner. It’s only consistency and perseverance that made the expert successful, they could have given up anytime.
Usually the things you sacrifice your “free” time for can be called a passion. Do you want to make a business out of that, or is it enough that you savor it?
Keep in mind your passion may not remained rooted, it may be more fluid developing over time.
Your passion and purpose take on the form you give it. It functions from your actions and inherent beliefs.
Like living, breathing, relationships, you need to treat it like being with someone who encourages you to keep falling in love with yourself.
Fall in love with you. Make the moves, step over the boundaries, and fly. In the words of Joe Brock, author of Thoughts Of Erotica:
“This is the way of the future where healthy, stable relationships (insert passions) are once again the norm and standard.”